Soul
by elany
Summary: I never loved anyone before you. And you simply love everyone. So tell me Feli, how is this what we have called a true love?  GermanyXItaly, Ludwig centered.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own. Otherwise there would be more than just two canon pairings.

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Chapter 1: Prologue

"Ludwig, Ludwig!" I felt his arms flung around me and his grinning face pressed at my neck as I tried to look over my shoulder making him retreat a little to look at my face. "I love you!"

"Yeah." Trying to focus on my work I turned around again.

"Hey Ludwig...aren't you forgetting something?" I heard him ask, still clinging to me. Demanding, as always.

"I love you too, Feli." Giggling a little, he let go of me and went doing whatever he was up to. At time given, probably making pasta for our lunch.

Now about earlier, don't get me wrong. I really do love him, even if he is a bit annoying at times. And can't do anything right except cooking and drawing. And lives in his own world. But at the same time, he's the only one with whom I would put up, being as incompetent as he is. Also, for such a long time too. We had been living together for almost four years now, ever since he moved into my house.

It's weird how we were never really friends and never really lovers. And if you are thinking something along the lines of "friends with benefits" right now, you are as far off as you could possibly be. It's nothing like that, we just have a…complicated relationship, that's all. At least from my point of view. But since I hadn't really been in one before, I guess that doesn't mean much, does it?

As I continued with my work, I heard Feliciano humming a song happily from the kitchen. Something about dancing, singing and sky, typically. Not giving it a second thought, I looked back at my work sighing. What has to be done, has to be done. And if there was only a pile of papers less, it could be even enjoyable. But for once I found it hard to concentrate on all the paperwork, and my mind wandered off again.  
Knowing and living with Feliciano changed me in many ways. Since I meet him, I actually made some friends, and with desire to do so too. Well, that's mostly just Kiku and I hadn't seen him in years, literally. But still, that's a big change for the asocial workaholic I was before. And even if it doesn't seems so, I'm very grateful to him for that. Over the years I gained great respect for him. For maintaining that sincere, happy smile through all the times, takes stronger character than anyone would have thought. Some might think that it comes naturally to him, but really, it doesn't. Or I'm just over thinking things again. Lately, I do that even more often than usually. I saw his tears, his smiles, his everything and that's something no-one else before him was willing to share with me.

Finally giving up on my work, I leaned back in my chair, hands behind my neck. From the kitchen, homely smell of pasta could be smelled, always wonderful for the senses, as Feli was nothing but a master cook. Homely, heh…Few years ago, it seems so far away now, I would only think of wurst and sauerkraut as homely. Not pasta. Or crazy Italian in my bed. Not that I mind it, I never really did, and with that I'm not referring to pasta. It startled me at first, who wouldn't feel at least a bit awkward suddenly sleeping in the same bed as someone you don't even know all that well. But with time I just adjusted to it, and later on even came to like it. Well it would be weird, to say, if I wouldn't, given our present relationship. Sometimes I wonder, if he back then even thought twice about doing it. With his culture being oh-so very open, I couldn't help but ask myself if it wasn't a common practice to sleep with each other at his place.

See now what I meant, when I said I'm over thinking everything lately? But more and more often, I can't help myself but to ponder, if getting together with Feliciano, was a mistake.

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A/N: Hello everybody! So, this is the (extremely short)prologue of my very first story! Hope you liked it, at least a lil bit. Now, I would just like to explain some things here. First, this is AU, therefore human names will be used. Second, it's going to be in Ludwig's point of view and so far I have no plans on changing it. Moreover, as you can see it's written in first person, which is pain-in-the*ss to write, so don't be too strict on me. ^^; I can't remember anything more to say right now, and I believe you don't want to listen to me for another hour anyway, soooo~ enjoy life =)

Reviews are greatly appreciated.

-Elany-


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own. Neither does Santa.

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One could say I don't live the most adventurous life. He would probably be right too. I wake up every morning, go to work come back home and eat lunch, made by the hands of my life partner. I don't do much in the afternoon, unless Feli gets some "great" idea of his(that happens from time to time, and it never end up exactly good), but usually I finish what was left from work end spend some pleasant hours with Feli, talking about our days, helping him cook diner or something. And sometimes I stop and think, did my life become a routine?

Do you remember, when you are a teenager and still have your whole life on your hands, how you dream about what your life is going to be like. I can't say I actually remember what my dream was back then, but it probably included lots of adventures and a busty blonde. Not much different from any other boy, I suppose. However, I'm pretty sure it did not include waking up early in the morning and working in the office. Male, Italian partner was probably excluded as well.

Girls dream to have life like me. Or more accurately, life like Feli. To stay home, taking care of the children (or dogs, in our case) while husband goes to work, then cuddling and such when he gets home. Then other times, I wonder, is he living his dream?

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As I sat down at the breakfast next morning, thoughts from yesterday were still present in my head. Well, not just from yesterday, those same ideas had been haunting me for quite some time now. Finally I decided to say them out loud.

"Feli…" I called him quietly, to get his attention.

"Ve…Oh? Lud? Did you say something?" He stopped chewing his toast and looked at me like I had just woken him up and he wasn't sure where he was, then smiled at me.

"Yes…yes I did. I would like to talk to you about something." I started slowly, for I wasn't sure what his reaction will be on what I have to say to him. "Had you ever thought about getting a job?"

For a moment he looked a little confused, I mean a little more than he normally is. "Job? Oh…no, I didn't. Why, you think is should?"

Well, for now he's taking this much better than I thought he would. "It might be good. If you agree, we can look together for something when I get home from work."

He looked down at his half-empty plate, as if he wanted to say something, but then simply lifted his head back up and smiled. "Sure, it might be fun."

I studied his face, to see if he really was ok with this whole thing. The last thing I wanted was to push him into something he didn't want to do. But he just ate his meal like out talk never happened, once again mumbling a little song to himself. And like usually, I didn't ask him about it but instead just continued with my meal like he did.

The look I felt on my back that day, when I was leaving for work, may indeed be a bit more longing than it usually was, but such a detail, went unnoticed by me.

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Finding a work for Feli had proved to be a harder thing to do than I initially thought. Beside the fact that he really wasn't a person who could function normally in any of ordinary jobs, he had very little talent for most of things people normally do for living. And he insisted he wanted to work in same company I did, which was highly impossible. Amongst other things.

Two hours of searching for work through various sources, brought no real results. Which wasn't all that surprising if you count in that we didn't even know what we were searching for. So we read every "situations vacant" we could find, but when we started thinking about him being an engineer, the whole thing became too ridiculous and we ended our search for that day.

However, after two weeks and a great deal of job applications sent around we still hadn't moved an inch and I was starting to lose my hope. I was just about to put another newspaper away, when something caught my attention.

"Oi, Feli. I think this one might be for you." At that point I couldn't hide the rising hope from my voice, the opportunity was just too perfect.

"A wedding decorator?" He asked with puzzled expression on his face. "What exactly do they do?"

"Hm…I guess they help decorating the churches and wedding halls and such. The ad is from wedding agency, searching for new workforce. Apparently they are new in the business, and need any help they can get. Golden opportunity, don't you think?"

For the first time since this whole job thing started, Feliciano looked honestly thrilled about something. With his heart naturally set on "amore" and his talent for anything artistic, the work was literally made for him.

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"Ah love, I'm sorry. The breakfast is pretty plain today…"

It wasn't, believe me. What he takes as a simple breakfast would be a royal meal for anyone else.

"…but I'm running late for work already. I have to meet the florist in half an hour and I yet have to prepare the colour scheme for Mr. Edelstein's wedding."

Surprisingly enough, Feli was actually taking his job seriously. Or more like, he was enjoying it enough to put some effort in it. He was rarely late for work, did his assignments with precision that could mach my own and even worked overtime on few occasions. Especially the later surprised me, since normally he didn't even want to go to the store alone, always clinging to me. So this willingness to be apart should probably strike me as odd, but on the other hand it's to be expected. I guess he just found himself something else to occupy his mind beside me. And really. I don't think there's anything to worry about. Beside these few times, he was acting completely normal, showing me his love in everything he did, or even more so than usually. But sudden mood swings weren't exactly a new thing either.

This time he was home unusually early. Even thought he said he has lots of work, the doors of our home opened once again in less than 4 hours or so. Loaded with quite possibly every shade of white known to a man, he staggered into the kitchen, tossing everything onto the table. Some client of his apparently really wished to have a "white wedding".

With an exhausted sigh he sat down on the chair, letting out a little "ve" before gladly taking the glass of water I was offering to him.

"Tough day? How come you are back already?" I asked, while watching him drink his water in one gulp.

"Ah…yes. I tried to finish everything really fast, because…this is your first day off in such a long time." Putting his glass down on the table once again, he turned back towards me with a genuine smile. The kind, I realized it just now, I used to see far more often than I do lately. But apparently, he's back to his normal self already.

I have to say that working harder than necessary just to get home sooner was pretty nice thing of him to do. I just hope he didn't do his work sloppily because of this…or run away in the middle of it. It certainly did look like that. Making an inner facepalm, I decided against commenting on it at all, instead simply asking him what he wanted to do now. A pair of arms slowly wrapping around my waist and a tender touch of his lips pressed against mine, was all the answer I needed.

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90% of this had been written more than a month ago already. But oh well, at least I can say I'm giving you new chapter as a Christmas present now! I have always wanted to do that! And I would like to thank everyone that commented/faved/added this story to his alerts! It means so much to me ^^

Hope you guys understand what's going on in Feli's head more than Ludwig does…


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